friday november 17 2006

today, all of a sudden i feel weak and sick when i woke up in the morning. my throat sore and whenever i swallow my saliva, it is like when someone swallowing 4 tablet of panadol at one go. my capable body felt very weak as if i have lost all the power that god has given me. it feels as if even someone as skinny as a bone and as weak as a piece of paper can give me one blow to knock me out. then i sweat a lot, as if i have exercise for a whole two hours none stop. but my body feels cold, very cold, like a spine chilling coldness that slips through my body right to my very flesh. my mum says my face look pale. i seriously dont know what to do or dont know what to do next. when i tried to stand up and walk my way to the toilet to bath for school, my head spin, as if i just came down from a roller coaster ride. i need to hold to the furniture in my house in order for me to just to stand up straight and to walk from the bedroom to the toilet.
man.. the experience was strange. my nose is runny since yesterday. thanks to my mum she advise me not to go to school today as i don look too good. but i have promise my judo seniors that i will come down for the event later today(5pm). but my mum says my health is far more important. i even plan to come to school in the afternoon after the friday prayers just to attend the event, but it is like my mind wanted to go but my body dont. and unfortunately i have eaten the medicine given by the doctor that makes me very drowsy. feel like the drug addicts in the movie you know, when they are high and stuff.

but i have to thank god for giving me this sickness today and now because of a few reasons. the first one is that when god give us something, like a sickness, or even a lottery strike. there are reasons behind it. i ask my mum why did god give me this sickness now? then my mum answered that things happen for a reason, she added that maybe if i come to school today something might have happen to me so thats why god give me this sickness, so that i am prevented from something. thats why in the last few days i have a feeling that something will happen, but i just dont know where and when. one more reason is that this sickness has make me rest. and i really need a rest after the suffering of reducing my weigh thinging has taken a toll of me. every single day i got back home late, like 8pm to the latest 9.30pm. i have work and play more then 12 hours a day. and i only sleep for 5 to 6 hours everyday. this "rest" is something i need very badly and god give the sickness to me to make me rest. thank you god... from the bottom of my heart.

from what i could remember, this is the first time in this year i am having a bad flu. and when i went to the doctor, ok.. before i continue my story i just want to add that this particular doctor is some what like my family doctor and i am really cared by him... so... back to the story... the doctor usually test my blood pressure whenever i visited him. usually to find news that says that i need to watch my weight, nothing serious really, but.. and i will repeat again but.. gladly he says i am a fine young man now and i am healthy. you guys see what this weigh lose program that i come up for myself has done to me, it has change my life for the better. he says continue to do what you are doing now and drink plenty of plain warm water, not cold water, just plain warm water. what i cannot believe is that all this while i have been exercising not in the gym but you guys know, the martial arts class and everything, the exersice regime is just not enough for me. thats another reason why i love to go to the gym now. i really improves my health tremendously after going to the gym for the past few weeks. thank you god for the health and prosperity...