friday 24 november 2006

hhmm... quite a lot of things happen this past week... if you guys read my 19 november post you guys may have known what i have been upto this past week... busy busy busy... then sudddenly... my recovering sickness came back with avengence... my fever has gone but then the flu came... not bird flu or sars guys... just normal flu... but this flu really has make me drop to my knees man... for your info... who says the rock never cry??? i just cry this past week man... damn... a man shouldnt cry to show his toughness and manlyness... but this flu has really taken a toll on me man... let me tell you guys wat happen on last thursday during my culture module...

9 am... i felt very cold and giddy plus i just ate my medicine from home so the drug affect still make me kind of high.

11am... the medicine affect is gone... and the coldness is terrible. i forgot to bring my medicine and i forgot to bring my sweater cum jacket to school so the flu strike swift and without mercy.

exactly 11.30am to 11.50am... i got out of my class because i cannot stand the cold then i bring my laptop with me to do my PPT. i rest and laid at the pantry... alone... shivering of coldness... then... finally... the rock cried... tears ran down my cheeks... i just can no longer stand the coldness and the pressure of having to complete the PPT in time... i struggled doing my PPT and at the same time crying, praying and hoping that god give me the strength to at least not making me faint because i am already seeing double at that time... my head need rest but all those thinking and PPT stuff has made my head... spinning.. and spinning.. i almost vomitted there and then too...
for your info.. nobody was there at that moment.. no close friends.. no classmates.. no friends from last semester.. no brotherhood.. no one is there for me when i am really in deep SHIT!!! ya.. i do have a handful of you guys asking me how am i feeling and getting me stuff and i really appreciate it.. thank you guys.. from the bottom of my heart.. you know who you are..
that is why every single thing that i put in my blog is not for fun or for entertainment purposes... even the song lyrics describe my feelings... every single word.. even the song I BELIEVE... expresses my deepest feelings... only the C-box is just an extra thing for me to catch up with my old friends...
that is why i say... i live alone and i die alone... it is true.. when i was in trouble last thursday.. nobody was there.. i have to act as if i am capable of doing and completing the PPT because i was the leader and i was the one who come up with the idea of Puteri Gunung Ledang myth and legend... i told you guys before that i am a man of my word... and if i start something... the rock will finish it even if it is a matter of life and death.. seriously guys.. you guys do not know me yet.. how determined i can become.. how i will sacrifice everything to accomplish my goals and targets... and thank god i am the SURVIVOR and god not only gives my strength, but also gives me a good mood... sick but good mood...

this weekend i will spend it preparing for my UT next week and i will rest for my OWN health...
ya.. alone.. i am the selfish, introvert, sun of a gun rite... and i say yes i am... and i am proud to be one... because there is no one else who will help us in this life except for god and ourself. FRIENDS WILL ONLY BE THERE WHEN YOU DONT NEED THEM, BUT WHEN YOU DO... THEY WILL LEAVE YOU DEAD ALONE ALL BY YOURSELF...

i have truly learnt the real meaning of having friends in Republic Poly... and i thank god for showing me the bad side of life here first hand... thank you god... i have grown from this experience and from this incident... and i will be more prepared next time... next week will come and i will continue to learn more about life...

REMEMBER... DONT BLAME ME FOR BEING EVIL OR UNMERCYFUL NEXT TIME BECAUSE IT IS YOU PEOPLE THAT TEACHES ME TO BE WHAT I AM RIGHT NOW...
and i wont give a damn even if you beg...